Looking Forward* ...

I'm pretty sure sometime in 2021 I will die.

It's is not suicide I'm talking about.  In some instances I have compassion, but overall suicide is unnatural and immoral.  I'm just talking, my time is up.

This how I see it going down: I'll be alone in my house.  Here comes the 

"gripper" - "I'm coming Elizabeth" - I'll bounce off a few walls, struggle, fall on my bed, breathe my last and shit my pants. Or a brain aneurysm, the blood will squirt out my ears. Don't leave me half-way Paramedics, please don't.  You are forgiven.

Advanced apologies to all involved in finding me days later.  Dying alone does have its benefits. My departing spirit will have the needed 72 hours to quietly process my next journey. Dying in a sterile hospital, shuffled off to the morgue, my spirit better have on an overcoat as they shove my body in the cooler. I will never go to a nursing home. I will stop eating. The consequences are mine.

To acquaintances I meet and befriend, I get along great. To my family and 'friends', my usefulness in their lives isn't needed anymore. I don't seem to have what they want. I'm existing, having a good laugh as I go, but simply existing. Living is what I want to do, but I have no takers to go along for the ride. Non-thinking, passive, brainwashed, soulless Meat Machines do not gain my favor, even family.  The grandchildren will split my little wealth and what little hope I have for the future of humanity.

There is a little cemetery in town. I'm going to find what a plot costs and buy it. No service, no priest bullshit over my casket, I don't care if anyone shows up. Put the box in the ground, say your last snarky, dismissive put-downs and cover it up.  I want a small gravestone with the words, "Is Anyone Listening?", my name and 1956-2021.

I don't know who is going to handle these arrangements, but that is what I want. There is a $10,000 burial insurance check waiting for you.