I might as well turn my loneliness into a strength. There is no one in my life. All allegiances are to the group. Individuals like me scare people. I may say something that disturbs them. I may comment on their fear based lives. Who knows? I may even disparage the government, their church or their asshole family member. I'm vulnerable as hell, but a threat nonetheless.
I'm older now and my rear view mirror can be seen clearly. In a few moments with a new someone, I seem to sense who they are, what they represent, and how their approach to me reveals their motivations before they say much of anything. Can I see into their heart? Yes, in a way. Mistakes, of course, if first impressions aren't true, but what is the point of going forward if they aren't true? It's easy to see people are scared little rabbits afraid of their own shoes. How they get out of bed is a wonder to me. From my window I see the bunnies come out of the woodpile and their actions remind me of people.
Deeply passive-aggressive to protect their existence, actually living is out of their consciousness. What little perceived wealth they have accumulated may be stolen, what emotional beaten slave in their life might leave, their comfort level is paramount. The individual in society represents forces outside the group-think which offers security. The only payment for such services is that person's soul.
Happiness is out of the questions for these entities. Almost all their laughter is at another's expense, again sucking the life out of society. No one is good enough for the group they are in. Like little boys in a cardboard fort, the world has to kept out. They never recognize the internal rot. The problem is always outside in their judgement.
DIVOC injections has only manifested what silently existed before. The hive mind is here. Belong or die.
I'll continue to read and educate myself only for my own curiosity. An intelligent man is not wanted in polite society. A talented man is only to raise jealousy. An opinion is to be squashed not fleshed out in discussion. A low trust society gets the destruction it deserves. I intend to withdraw further and let them eat themselves. Interacting with soulless, uninteresting bio-robot people is over. I intend to expand my soul, work on my peace of mind, and look people in the eye. That scares the shit out of them and keeps them away.
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