1) Let's call abortions "weeds".
2) In the future, the only thing I am to say to a woman is "More coffee, please."
3) Communism is for the lazy.
4) Why does the counter person at the State-run Pot House always look like a demon?
5) Everyone with a cell phone is smarter than me.
6) I have never met a bridge I didn't burn.
7) The only time people are equal is when they are hungry.
8) Women with large thumbs can be trusted.
9) I've learned a lot in this life. It seems nobody learned with me.
10) Professional golf is as honest and true as professional wrestling.
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